Tuesday, March 18, 2008

PLAIN ENGLISH, March 18th

Writing clear, direct English is particularly important in a business context. Please rewrite the following item; there are many different but correct ways of doing this.

The meeting that was held to discuss possible methods of ensuring workplace cleanliness by the external consultants who were hired by the company was both instructional and at various times amusing and even entertaining.

Responses are saved in the archives.

11 comments:

Kelsey said...

The workplace cleanliness meeting held by external consultants was instructional, amusing and even entertaining.

Tammy said...

Our company hired external consultants to address workplace cleanliness, it was instructional, amusing, and entertaining.

Margaret said...

The workplace cleanliness meeting held by company hired external consultants was instructional, amusing, and entertaining.

Samantha said...

The workplace cleanliness meeting, held by the external consultants, was amusing and entertaining.

Veronica Baig said...

Kelsey: Some good changes.
Tammy: Also good, but remember which punctuation is requried between independent clauses.
Margaret: Yes, but this could be improved with some additional punctuation.
Samantha: Good start, but note that you have missed out the "instructional" element.

Tammy said...

Our company hired external consultants to address workplace cleanliness; it was instructional, amusing, and entertaining.

Veronica Baig said...

Tammy: Even better!

Janine said...

The workplace cleanliness meeting held by the external consultants was instructional, amusing and entertaining.

Veronica Baig said...

Janine: That's a good way of doing it.

Margaret said...

The workplace cleanliness meeting, held by company hired external consultants, was instructional, amusing, and entertaining.

Veronica Baig said...

Margaret: Great!